Put down the protein supplements, get the fuck off those ellipticals — your favorite excuse to eat basically ice cream is back and more accessible than ever. The effortlessly photogenic Blue Bowl is a superfood spot frequented by Chapman students of all shades of blonde, and its famous açai is notably one of the only foods white people feel comfortable correcting you on the pronunciation of. This fall, it will be adding five (!!) new parking spaces, which will reportedly be able to accommodate a whopping two badly-parked Jeeps and one mini cooper that appears from a distance to be an open spot.
“This is the kind of progress you always dream about, but never thought would actually come.” says Erica Allison, white. “I’m so glad I don’t have to pay that extra $2 to park at the children’s hospital”
When asked what the future holds, Blue Bowl replied that it plans to expand into Nguyen’s Kitchen, which it claims has “zero positive effect on the community.” After trying the garlic noodles, this writer agrees.
