On the third floor of Leatherby Libraries, things got messy in an argument between couple Michael Bradley and Lia Jones. "Neither of them would shut the fuck up," one student said. "I have six midterms. I don't give a shit if he's texting Sophie from the dorm pools again." The couple’s breakup also revealed private and embarrassing details about their personal lives. For instance, Lia was known to have picked up and inquired about many of the far-right extremist posters found around campus, while Michael often swindled thousands from fixed-income elderly relatives to support his defunct wet t-shirt cornhole league.
The argument escalated when both parties began hurling priceless pieces of memorabilia from the Disney archive at one another. That afternoon, a replica of Mickey Mouse’s wand from Fantasia had to be removed from a Freshman’s eye. Public-Safety arrived to deescalate the situation, but couldn’t fit their bikes through the metal detectors. The breakup eventually petered out and students returned to their studies before again being distracted by Michael and Lia’s make-up sex in the War Letters Archive. Hundreds of war-time testimonials and love letters were lost in the bang.
