After approximately 45 minutes of steady drippage, the rain has forced over 97% of SoCal natives into deep naps. However, this phenomenon known as “Colder Weather Than Usual” has given a rise of power to Panthers from the East.
Brave Bridget Lucas, SCC major from Maine, told The Kumquat, “Flash Flood? More like Flash Mob!” Then, immediately, over 50 students wearing tank tops, Speedos and Gucci flip flops began dancing to “That’s What I Like” by Bruno Mars in the Piazza. Stephen Johansen, Film Studies major, was seen spitting on locals and throwing “I <3 NY” T-shirts in their face.
Pubic Safety has advised locals to stay in their house, wearing a minimum of 6 layers. When asked when it will return, The Sun said, “When I feel like it, okay? I can’t be everywhere all the time.” Hold tight, Chapman U. Things won’t be wet forever. Well, unless you want it to be ;)
