I study every Sunday morning bright and early.

I’ve never slept on my bathroom floor. I’m always getting good rest in my own bed.

I get asked on so many dates and they’re all at Bruxie, a high end delicious restaurant that I love.

I say no to all the strangers who offer me drugs.

My roommate is wonderful and there are never rogue pubes in the shower.

I’m in great health. Nobody I know has had a mysterious illness for two weeks,

The food options on campus are great. I’m eating well. Full of nutrients.

Yes, I definitely will meet a life partner in college and know my career path. 

I love everything. Everything is great!