Struppa really dropped the ball! Or should we say “diamond”. Tragedy struck on campus when Daniele Struppa, during a one-day on-campus exhibition of the renowned Tiger’s Tempest Diamond, picked it up to get a better look. It slipped out of his hand and he fumbled for it midair before it landed squarely on the hard stone floor and shattered irreparably into hundreds of small fragments.
This incident is just the latest in a series of unfortunate mishaps caused by the school president. Some may recall when at the farmers market he stepped on a rake and hit himself in the nose. Fowler administration laments the time Struppa was walking by Keck when he heard a whistling sound, stopped in confusion, looked side to side, then got hit by a falling anvil.
The solution? Chapman admin is taking measures to mitigate Struppa’s bad luck. “He’s on ‘ominous object’ probation,” says Kelly Fignelli, talisman expert and Struppa’s school-appointed luck-cleanser. “This means, for example, he’s not allowed to own mirrors to prevent the risk of them breaking, or to own ladders to prevent one from being walked under, and there’s no way in hell he’s getting anywhere near the new Argyros Museum of Porcelain & Fine China.”
