Our Philz uses toilet water to clean out the espresso machine. Pie Hole is absolutely the place you should get coffee and do work.

Get to frat parties early (around 7:30pm) and leave before 10:00pm. You want to make a memorable, ethereal first impression around golden hour. Plus they start spiking drinks at 10:01.

You can only go inside the gym if you know the secret password. They will ask you for it at the front desk. 

There will be one freshman sacrificed at the end of O-Week, which your OL probably mentioned. It is decided by random draw and is conducted by Pete the Panther via cyanide. 

“Walk sign is on for all crossing” backwards sounds just like “Chapman University” if you say it out loud. That’s why they did it. 

Sometimes there are famous skateboarders outside Beckman. Their autographs alone are worth thousands of dollars; all you have to do is give them a Mocha Cookie Crumble Frappuccino and ask nicely.  

Blaze is way, way better than Pizza Press.